Honesty Rant

I'm not looking for sympathy or help... I just need to get this out. Because this blog is my journal. And maybe one day I can look back at this and learn something. Maybe not though.
Anyway.
Today for PAWS they gave us seniors a big long speech on staying eligible to graduate and whatnot. They talked about senior dinner dance (which I'm SO excited for!) and about all the fun things coming up this next month. Well, I'm a lot like most of the seniors at my school. I just want to gtfo. But at the same time, I don't want to leave. Copper Hills has been such a huge part of my life! I have spent wayyy more time there than most students. I mean come on, who can say they have played hide and seek in the dark hallways at one in the morning after a marching band competition? Yeah. Exactly.
Band has kept me at school late into the night only to return again early in the morning. The band room has been my second home. Sometimes my first. I have made SO many friends who have changed my life. The worst part about leaving is knowing that things will never be the same. Sure, you can go visit, but the people don't really want you there. They don't care about you anymore. I've been watching it happen for 3 years now. You lose your friendships and the band changes. They have new inside jokes and silly dances and sayings. Once you leave, you can never go back.
It just kind of hit me today. It's really over. It's time to graduate and get a life. Sure, it's exciting. But for those of us who have no flipping clue where to go to college or what to study, it SUCKS. I'm scared! I'm poor! I can't take care of myself! How the heck am I going to do this?!
I know countless people have done it. I'm just not quite ready. I'm not ready to leave this wonderful life and head into the life of an adult. The grass is NEVER greener on the other side. It's brown and crunchy and it smells like the government stealing all your money.
Haha. :)
It's just not very exciting. And I'm so selfish that I don't want Copper Hills to continue having students go through it. Because that is MY school.
Which brings me to my next point: they had elections for class officers today. One of my really good band friends was running and I was so proud of him! He's a good worker and I know popularity is exactly what he wants. Since I'm a selfish jerk, I wanted him to lose. I wanted him to be drum major and band council VP. I wanted him to keep his dedication to his friends and not get sucked into the terrible world of student government.
*disclaimer: I do not by any means hate the student gov. I think they are wonderful people who have a lot going for them. But no doubt, they sell their souls to it. They forget about the "little people" who helped get them where they are today. They only talk to you during sub for Santa when they want your money. And they have no time to just hang out with you. And it sucks.*
So basically I didn't want that stuff to happen to him. But it will. Because he won.
I was standing there in the choir room with Vocalise when the announcement came on. I had my fingers crossed. But they said his name anyway and I immediately began to feel sick. Sick with worry, jealousy, anger... Terrible things you should never feel about one of your friends being so happy.
I grabbed my keys and walked straight out to my car. I couldn't see or breathe or function normally. By the time I got to the end of the parking lot I was crying. Hard. I never cry. Ever. Only when I get hurt or my patents yell at me. Never because of sadness. But I cried. Because I was sad. And fearful for the future of MY band and MY friends. I thought back to the first time he talked to me. The first time he smiled at me. The first time he called me "girl". The first time he sat by me on the bus. The first time he held my hand. Hugged me. Kissed me. Told me I was his best friend. The first time we danced together. Everything. It all flooded into my mind and I cried even harder. It's over. All of it. High school, being with my friends, being with him... It'll never be the same. I just can't handle being this old. Where did the time go?!
So I came home and locked myself in my room and just let myself be sad. Because sometimes you've just gotta do that.
Then I got ready for work.
I love my job. It turned my whole entire day around. Those kids are so great.
"Well I accidentally put in 12 oz." -me
"That's okay it'll just be HUGE." -Jason
And then I die of laughter right in front of the dip box.

Wow. I feel better.
:)

Enjoy this picture. I find it quite funny.

Dear Boys Part 5

I feel like it's been forever!

Dear Already,
Maybe, maybe not. We'll just have to see.
Sincerely, Unsure

Dear Compliments,
Thanks ;)
Sincerely, Actually Flattered

Dear Megan,
Thanks for being HILARIOUS all the time. I honestly can't imagine life without you.
Sincerely, Mother

Dear Boy,
If you know what's good for you, you'll stop it. I know what your motives are. You may have the whole school fooled but not me. Don't try to be someone you aren't.
Sincerely, Girl

Dear Far,
I wish this wasn't so awkward. Why can't it just be like it always has been with us? I miss you a lot.
Sincerely, Even Further

Dear Alma,
Thanks for being such a good example to me. You may be difficult to read, but I'm thankful for it. It gives me the strength I need every day.
Sincerely, Learning

Dear Bro Jo,
This is the part where I blog about you. :) Thanks for being my teacher and always giving me the exact lessons I need. You've changed my life.
Sincerely, The SemCo Girl

Dear Elmer,
You make me want to get up on Fridays. Sitting across from you in meetings makes my whole day. Thanks for serving with me :)
Sincerely, Flutter

Dear Babe,
That's your name to me. No matter what. You mean the world to me.
Sincerely, Princess

Dear Dew Addict,
I love being around you. You make me feel so carefree. Like I'm in another time. Thanks for coming back :)
Sincerely, KARA WINTER!

Dear Mr. Perfect,
So uh. Where are you? I'm so 400% over this whole "dating" thing. Just come find me and everything will be great. :)
Sincerely, Wifey

Dear Dragon Man,
I'm glad you are my friend. You really do make my life easier. It's nice to have someone to talk to about things. :) Hang in there, it will get better!
Sincerely, Locker #89

Dear Dad,
You. Are. The. Best.
Love, Janester

The end :)

They Call Me A Workin' Man

So yesterday was my first day at Jamba! I still can't believe how old I am. Seems like just yesterday I was starting 7th grade without a clue in the world. Hahaha anyway I got there at like 3:38 and sat in my car for about ten minutes. I didn't want to be late so I left wicked early :P
Thankfully Elise and our friend Ashley were both working so they pulled me in to the back to meet everyone and Emily (the boss) gave me a bunch of stuff to fill out. She was so nice and very patient with me. But neither of us wanted to do my tax stuff wrong. Haha :)
Then she gave me my uniform and took me on a tour of the store. It's so cute and it smells delicious! She talked me a lot...most of which I don't remember...so thankfully she said, "You'll get it all soon don't worry." so I just smiled. What I do best! ;)
Then she gave me the bible aka training manuel and told me to read the raspberry section. It was very informative and it took me forever to read but eventually Kathy quizzed me and I got them all right! Ten points to Griffendor! (Excuse the Harry Potter reference)
Emily and Ashley left so there was only me, Elise, Kathy, and Austin in the store. Elise came over and told me she'd teach me how to wash dishes! So we went over to the giant sink and I washed some stuff :) We cleaned out the orange juicer thing and I learned where a lot of stuff is.
Elise asked me if I wanted to make a smoothie and I was like heck yeah! She's been helping me memorize the classic recipes so I have a few under my belt :) I made a strawberries wild and it was delish if I do say so myself :) she showed me how to pour and then I put my smoothie in the fridge :)
For the rest of the night I continued to make every strawberries wild that came through and even a few others :) I'm not sure how many people make smoothies on their first day... But the numbers have got to be few. Haha so needless to say I felt awesome.
I love how everyone there works as a team. They are all so nice and willing to help you with anything. They work in an assembly line of some sort and communicate quite well. I sure did pick a great place to work :)
I was supposed to get off at 8 but stayed a little longer because it was SO MUCH FUN. I mean come on who doesn't love having a singing and dancing party every five minutes? Exactly.
Anyway it was just super awesome and I hope I can get through training fast and actually start being helpful. I'm still really slow but it will come :) I can't wait until I'm as good as Elise. She's a spectacular teacher :)
Until next time!
:) <3 data-blogger-escaped-br="">

Home Sweet Home

So I've been on vacation for the past week or so. (That's how I'm going to justify my serious lack of blog posts... :) ) My family and I went on a cruise to celebrate my parent's 30th anniversary and my sister and brother-in-law's 8th. It was super rad! I can't wait until I get the energy to blog about it! haha tomorrow maybe... when I'm not at school or doing homework or STARTING MY FIRST DAY OF WORK! Yep. That's right. I start at Jamba tomorrow and I'm flipping NERVOUS! Luckily one of my best friends also works there and she's been talking with me about it and helping me realize that everything is going to be just fine. :) Aside from the nerves I'm pretty excited! I can't believe it's taken me this long to finally be brave enough to get a job but I did it and I'm super proud! hahaha :) Elise has been giving me a head start on memorizing recipes and whatnot. She's the best I tell you! We had a nice long chat today while we were delivering things to some girls in the ward. We talked about how we've been friends for so long and how we have managed to get over dumb things and realize that friendship is worth more than a little fight.
We have been neighbors since we were 8 years old. The first time I ever saw her I knew she'd be my best friend. She walked into primary wearing a pretty white dress and the presidency introduced her and we sang the hello song. I couldn't stop staring at her. I just felt like wow... I want to get to know that girl! I felt like such a creep but I couldn't ignore the feeling I had. I knew she would be an important part of my life.
The first time we ever played together we had a blast. We made up these ridiculous stories about how her room was haunted and we would hide in the closet and then come back out to see if anything in her room had moved. Of course they never did, unless one of us secretly moved them before going back into the closet. It was the DUMBEST game on the planet but it was so great. We laughed and talked and hung out every single day for the rest of forever. She's always been the person that I could talk to about anything. We'd have sleepovers and talk in funny voices and eat bricks of raw ramen. She always understood me. We could communicate without even speaking to each other. We walked to school, played barbies, and laughed together every single day. The whole school knew we were besties. I always had someone to sit by at church and her family was so sweet to me. Elise is someone who I can't imagine growing up without. She is one of the few people aside from my family who has ever seen me REALLY cry. We've been through everything together... and I mean everything! hahaha.
Middle school was an interesting time but we stayed friends through the whole thing. We fought a lot more and didn't speak for days at a time but we always had that same connection. She was that person that I couldn't stay mad at very long because I had important things to tell her. :) Sophomore year came and we still hung out every now and then but I was in band and she had Emery. We were still able to get together and chat and be silly like always. That's when I started to realize that she was more than just a convenient friend for me. If I had to TRY to make time to see her, it would prove that she meant something to me and that I wanted to keep our relationship alive. Well I guess it worked. :)
Nowdays we're still best friends. I can't think of anyone who knows me better than she does. We still have that really great friendship we've always had...it's just different now. Our lives consist of real problems and challenges that we talk each other through. Sometimes I wish we could go back to when we were 8 and the only thing that mattered is what our barbies were wearing. Now we're being faced with college and money and relationships and all kinds of weird grown up things. She's still right there with me though. Talking to her today made me realize that even if she's living in Orem and I'm still here, even if we never ever get to see each other, even if I move to Ohio, she'll still be there for me. She'll still text me funny memories or want to get together and hang out. She's one of the few people I think I will be able to stay close to after high school. And even if I'm wrong, I'm very thankful for the friendship we've had. 10 years is a long time to know someone and still be able to get along with them. We're so alike but yet so different. I think we balance each other out quite nicely :) We've grown up together and I know she's been a good influence on me. I'm thankful to have had such a quality friend to confide in my whole life.
Thanks Elise for being a pal and always letting me eat your food and pet your dog. :) I wish you the best in your life ahead and I hope that I'll always be a part of it. :)

Boating at our trek family reunion
August 2011
Courtesy of Ma
:)

Well, that wasn't where I thought this post was going to go... but hey, it's my blog. And these are the kinds of things I want to remember. I want to look back one day and think aw yeah! she's so cool! haha :)

Have an excellent day!
<3

Kolby's 20th Birthday

On Friday my best friend turned 20. He's so old :P
We went to dinner with his parents at Panda Express and had a nice time :) Then we went back to his house and watched Undercover Boss and his mother made cake!

 She let me frost it :)

Then we sang to him!

About four different times.

:)

Well anyway the cake was yummy. (duh).

So after that it was like 9 and it was time to head to the beloved ghetto laundromat to wash paint smocks. I know, I can hardly believe it's already time to participate in that wonderful chore again...but it is. (Click here for a reminder of last time's adventure!) So Kolby and I headed to my house to get in my car and begin the journey of paint-smock-washin!

He bit his nails and shuddered as I drove us to the laundromat. (I'm not even that bad at driving? I only almost killed us twice the whole night!) I knew where it was but I second guessed myself and we were lost for just a moment. We safely arrived at about 9:20 and were greeted by a very nice looking lady! (Not really. She was asleep in a chair but completely harmless.) We hauled in all the black garbage bags and soap and whatnot and set up camp. Thankfully the cheap washers weren't being used so that was nice. We lined up all the bags and began to wash! Kolby was a great little helper! He put the quarters in while I stuffed smocks in the washers.

From the eyes of K. B. Walthall

I heart those $1.75 washers <3

"Are you sure you are supposed to do it like that?" "No but it works so don't judge."

hahahaha

To my very great dismay, the dryers are no longer free on Fridays ):

So I began to panic as I tried to calculate how much money it would take to wash and dry all of the loads. I had $20 worth of quarters but I knew that wouldn't be enough and I had no idea how long it would take to dry everything... So Kolby ran over to Smith's and got us some more quarters so that I could calm down. I sure do love that kid <3 hahaha mostly because I was super afraid when he left... Being somewhere like that alone at night is so flippin scary. I'm glad he came with me so I didn't have to endure that night alone!

My wallet housed roughly 100 different quarters that night. I wish I could have taken a picture of them all. But here are some of them :)

After we got the system down it was pretty easy. We make a lovely team :) We talked and laughed and took pictures. We were there alone for most of the night. Only a few people came in. (I guess no one thinks doing laundry is a very fun Friday night activity?) We had fun trying to figure out the gender of some of the folks. "From this side, he looks like a guy. From the other, he looks like a girl. I just can't figure it out." haha.... terrible....

Just waiting for stuff to dry...

:)

This is how we felt when we found out the dryers aren't free.

>:/

We got tired... hahaha

Poor kid was so beat... ):

When we were finally done it was after midnight. We took everything out to my car and Kolby looked funny :)

"Can I take a picture or are you going to die?" "Take a picture. I want to remember this!"

We drove back to my house and picked my mom up so we could take the stuff back to her school. That place is ultra creepy at night. I basically ran down the halls in order to avoid the killers lurking in every dark corner.

At 1:00 we were finally home and I was so beyond ready for bed! Kolby and I talked for a bit and I wished him a very happy birthday :) It was so nice of him to spend his night doing something super lame with me. But it turned out to be a lot of fun and I really appreciate his help :)

Basically, my life is awesome.
:)

Taco Bell

Sometimes my friends and I have nothing to do at 11 p.m.
So we go to Taco Bell.
Unfortunately, Taco Bell's store isn't open at that hour.
So then we have to go through the drive thru.
(But that's okay because Doritos tacos are delicious and worth every bit of effort it takes to obtain one.)
Then we hang out in the parking lot and run around like children do.
It's quite fun. :)

I love them. And I love being a careless teenager.

YOLO.
DFTBA.